Tag Archives: NWA Couples Counseling

Premarital Counseling Benefits

Premarital counseling can be a benefit for couples who choose to make this investment before marriage. It can help couples build a foundation for their relationship, improve communication skills, and reduce the risk of future conflicts. Working with a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) can provide a safe and supportive environment for couples to explore their expectations, values, and goals for their future together.

One of the primary benefits of premarital counseling with an MFT is improved communication skills. Couples learn how to effectively communicate their needs, feelings, and concerns, which can reduce misunderstandings and promote deeper intimacy. Couples also learn how to listen actively, empathize with each other’s perspectives, and express themselves in a non-judgmental way.

In addition to communication skills, premarital counseling can also help couples explore important issues that they might not want to talk about otherwise in a safe space. This exploration can help couples identify potential areas of conflict or unforeseen circumstances and develop strategies to manage those conflicts in a constructive way.

Premarital counseling with an MFT can also help couples develop a stronger sense of commitment for a long-lasting relationship. By working together to identify shared goals and values, couples can create a vision for their future.

Ultimately, premarital counseling with an MFT can help couples build a strong, relationship. By investing in their relationship before marriage couples can set themselves up for a better chance for success for a fulfilling future together.

Call today to schedule an appointment with a licensed MFT, please leave a voice mail at 479-225-0055. Offering 60 min. sessions on a sliding scale fee to fit most schedules and budgets in the NWA area or anywhere in Arkansas.

Thank you.

Healthy Relationships

Building and maintaining healthy relationships is a journey that requires effort, patience, and commitment, to a likeminded individual. Whether you’re in a romantic partnership, a friendship, or a family relationship, the following tips can help you establish and nurture healthy connections.

Effective communication is key to any healthy relationship. This means being open and honest with your partner or friend, expressing your needs and concerns in a respectful manner, and actively listening to their perspective. Communication also involves being mindful of your tone and body language and avoiding behaviors that might be considered negative.

Trust is another essential element of healthy relationships. This involves being reliable, consistent, and transparent in your actions, and respecting your partner’s boundaries and privacy. Trust also means being vulnerable and sharing your thoughts and feelings with your partner and being supportive of them in kind.

Healthy relationships also require a willingness to compromise and work through conflicts. This means acknowledging and addressing issues when they arise, and seeking out solutions that work for both parties. It also involves being patient and empathetic and understanding that relationships are not always perfect or easy.

Finally, self-care is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships. This means taking care of your own physical and emotional needs, setting boundaries to protect your time and energy, and prioritizing activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. When you take care of yourself, you are better equipped to show up as your “best self” in your relationships.

Please call NWA Marriage Family Therapy at 479-225-0055 Office V. M. to make a 60 min. appointment. Offering an affordable sliding scale fee for clients who live in the NWA area or anywhere in Arkansas. Weekends are available..

Thank You.

Enhancing Relationship Tips

These enhancing relationship tips may help you trouble shoot and avoid relationship confrontations in healthy well attached relationships. These tips sound simple and commonsensical enough and they are.

The challenging thing for most couples is to implement them regularly and to take timely action. Small steps that are consistent and regular are more effective than large unfulfilled promises. So keep working on developing your skills and keep your love active.

Tip 1) Fulfill any communication agreements you have made if you have a disagreement. For example, agreements to take time outs, cooling off periods, or other prior de-escalation rules you have made. When conflict heats up sticking to these agreements is very important.

Tip 2) Share the intentions of your actions. Actions can be better understood by your partner or accepted, if the intentions are clearly explained beforehand to the other person. Assume that your partner has good intentions. (Note: only in safe, securely attached relationships).

Tip 3) Follow the golden rule, it truly is golden. Show your authentic appreciation, regularly through words and actions, that connect and make sense to your partner.

Hopefully your actions will be noticed and appreciated, and your partner will reciprocate their appreciations with time. These enhancing relationship tip skills take practice, so stay consistent.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

NWA Marriage & Family Therapy has been serving the NWA for a decade and in the last two years, I have been serving couples at your convenience. electronically anywhere in Arkansas.

If you would like a couple’s session to talk about your specific situation, as a couple or on your own, please give me a call anytime. Leave an office voice mail message at (479) 225-0055 (no text).

Thank You

Valentine’s Day Intimacy Fears?

Valentine’s Day is almost here. For some people this day brings about fears around intimacy. How soon is too soon to celebrate Valentines Day as a “couple”? Maybe just celebrate as friends? lovers? or celebrate love in general?

Do you ever think, “I want to be close, but just how close is it comfortable for me? ”

Are you comfortable with the idea of being close and staying close? Are you comfortable with the idea with giving as well as receiving over a Longterm relationship? Will you be testing your love often? How comfortable are you with commitment? If you move forward into a relationship, will you feel obligated, trapped or controlled? Will you feel like you will be losing your freedom or a part of you?

Exploring these questions is important for you to know where you are as far as desiring and maintaining long term intimacy.

Finally, knowing where your lover is as far as their intimacy abilities? Are they open and available to being intimate? Are they willing, capable and as vested as you? Are you well matched as far as your expectations and abilities? It’s good to think about these things on your own, as well as talking together.

There can be so many ways to celebrate and to create a meaningful intimate relationship on Valentine’s Day, as well as other types of friendships. Taking the opportunity and time to celebrate love in its many forms, is a day well spent.

So…..Happy Valentines Day!

Please call NWA Marriage & Family Therapy at 479-225-0055 to schedule an online appointment, if you would like to talk further.

Thank you.

Gaslighting the 2022 Word of the Year: Exploring Relationship Gaslighting

What is Relationship Gaslighting?

“Relationship Gaslighting” refers to when one person in a relationship intentionally distorts their partner’s perception of reality for their own manipulative advantage. This can manifest in many ways and can cause the partner to question their own judgement, values, or perceptions.

Signs of Relationship Gaslighting

There are signs to notice when you are being gaslighted. Fault will be assigned to you when you attempt to question explanations or when you feel most vulnerable or powerless from the confusion fallout and insecurity that gaslighting eventually causes.

Questioning to attempt to clarify may bring on statements that you are too sensitive, jealous, or overall unworthy in various ways. This can cause you to feel isolated and confused, and begin doubting yourself.

The Impact of Relationship Gaslighting

Gaslighting can have a significant impact on one’s emotional and mental health. Enduring continued gaslighting is unhealthy and will emotionally unbalance you. It is important to distinguish between real and genuine relationship difficulties and manipulative relationship gaslighting.

How to Address Relationship Gaslighting

As a Marriage and Family Therapist, I have seen relationship difficulties and manipulative relationship like gaslighting. It is important to explore the different ways the relationship may manifests and the many nuances. To balance the discomfort caused by gaslighting, many people try to talk themselves out of their feelings with positive self-talk. However, usually these actions are not effective, and the gaslighting will continue.

As a Marriage and Family Therapists, I have seen both and have helped individuals and couples explore the different angles and nuances so they can see clearly for themselves.

Call NWA Marriage and Family Therapy to discuss a counseling appointment. Offering sliding scale fee at your convenience. Serving clients virtually anywhere in Arkansas.

Office voice mail 479-225-0055. Thank you.

4 Relationship Abilities

Four, simple yet powerful abilites that need to be nurtured in your relationship are:

RESPECT: To ability to consider, admire and appreciate with high regard the value of your partner. The ability to refrain from interfereing or intruding by showing warm deference to the other’s actions or thoughts.

RECIPROCITY: The ability in a relationship for mutual influence, exchange of healthy dependence of mutual behaviors, thoughts and feelings. The ability to exchange these in a naturally way between partners, for the benefit of their relationhsip.

REMORSE: The ability to feel anguish and distress that arises from a sense of guilt for having comitted past wrongs that impacted your relationship. Especially, for those acts that can not be remedied. This ability also includes a sense of deep regret for the consequences, created by the actions taken that impacted your partner.

REPAIR: The ability to renew, restore and remedy in part or in full past harms, so as to come together, to reunite, reconnect, and eventualy be able to function anew.

NWA Marriage & Family Therapy offers affordable, 60 minute virtual sessions anywhere in Arkansas. Offering Relationship, Couples, and Marriage counseling with a sliding scale fee. Apointments are at your convenience using your smart phone or computer. No special techincal or software know how needed, super simple.

Call 479-225-0055 to set up an apointment or to answer any questions.

Thank you.

Quote “3 Classes of People”

“There are three classes of people;

Those who see.

Those whos see, when they are shown.

Those who do not see”.

-Leonardo da Vinci (1452-1519)

This is an interesting quote to ponder. I was wondering how this could be applied to therapy in general. I would say all three types come to therapy at some point for different reasons. Those who see, may struggle with their knowingness, unable to feel others really understand, or they struggle when sharing their sights. Those who see, when they are shown often have many “aha” moments. Suddenly things begin to make sense to them in a way unlike before. And then there are those who do not see. They usually visit for a while, with no ability for insight or change. Non seers, are either unwilling or simply just unable to see. They for the most part, remain the same.

All three types vary in their own personal abilities and mingle equally in a variety of socioeconomic and ethnicity groups.

This quote offers yet another model for “seeing” the world.

New Years Tribute, NWA Marriage & Family Therapy

 

Happy New Year’s 2019.  Reflecting on  2018 I was thinking some times it is good to take a look back  to remember those folks who lived and came before us.  Way before us.  We are here because they survived and had the strength to carry on even in very difficult circumstances, often facing situations that in their time seemed impossible to  overcome or endure.  We as people, are stronger and more resilient  than we believe to face our situations.

Please call NWA Marriage & Family Therapy @ 479-225-0055 to set an appointment for couples or individual counseling, at your convenience.  If you need my services, in Fayetteville, Bella Vista, or Ft. Smith.please leave a voice message and I will call back.

Thank you  and I look forward  to hearing from you.

Happy 2019 New Year’s to all as we head forward.

Carmen

The Four Way Test-Decision Making

 

 

“The Four Way Test” used by the Rotarian Club that I share below as a reprint of a simple four-part ethical guideline to use when exploring and making decisions in an ethical manner.  Credit to Web link below.

 

http://thefourwaytest.com/history-of-the-four-way-test/

The Four Way Test

1. Is it the TRUTH?

2. Is it FAIR to all Concerned?

3. Will it build GOODWILL and BETTER FRIENDSHIPS?

4. Will it be BENEFICIAL to all concerned?

 

Good therapeutic questions to use and explore through life when communicating with your spouse, couple, friends and or family.

Call NWA Marriage and Family Therapy at 479-225-0055 for an individual marital or couples appointment for affordable licensed therapy. Thanks!

 

Counseling and Therapy Contact Websites For NWA Marriage & Family Therapy

NWA Marriage & Family Therapy

Below are links to find my services and other free and useful counseling information.  Marriage therapy, couples counseling and individual clinical counseling  provided in the NWA area and Ft. Smith in a private practice setting.  I have an affordable sliding scale fee for a 60 minute session, depending on your income.

I am a clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. see    https://aamft.org

I can be found  on their www.therapylocator.com listing.

My private practice is going on its seventh year in business serving a variety of clients from all walks of life.   I  have offices in various locations and it is sometimes hard to get google maps to cooperate with a business that has more than one location.  In addition to Fayetteville Arkansas, I also serve Bella Vista as well as the Ft. Smith area

You can also find my verified services listed as well as other valuable counseling information on Psychology Today.  See…

https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_detail.php?profid=157622&rec_next=61&ref=6&sid=1507733323.2675_7511&city=Fayetteville&county=Washington&state=AR&tr=ResultsProfileBtn

My services are also listed at Goodtherapy.org

https://www.goodtherapy.org/therapists/profile/carmen-cubillo-20131231

Any of the above web site links might help you in finding a face to face therapist and are good sources for free information as to counseling or therapy in general.

Calling the office at 479-225-0055 NWA Marriage & Family Therapy and leaving a voice message is the best way to reach me to make an appointment or simply  answer any questions you may have.

Thank you.

Carmen